Looking Forward

As I recover from the last of my surgeries stemming from my breast cancer, I can't help but reflect on the past year as well as look towards the future.  I have learned so much, grown so much, changed so much, over the past year.  I don't want to go back to the same life I was living before.  I want to be healthier, fitter, more active.  I want to seek God's will in my life and make it a reality.  I want to take all that He's done for me this year and use it to grow His kingdom.  The big, BIG question is how.  Well I know to be healthier, fitter, more active I plan to start running.  As soon as I am fully recovered from this surgery I plan to start the Couch to 5K plan.  I have wanted to run 5k's or Fun Runs for years like my sister does, but have never taken the initiative to get started.  Now, I have something to run for.  I know there are multiple 5k's in our area to raise money and awareness for cancer, and I want to be right in the middle of them!  Figuring out God's will for my life and how to use what I've learned the past year is much harder.  I am at a cross roads in my work life right now as well because of an upcoming layoff.  I am faced with the question of where I will be working and making a living.  Will I go to another ordinary job, or will I finally find the career I've always wanted.  Can I go back to school to get my teaching certificate?  Should I go to nursing school so that I can work with cancer patients?  Will I ever get to the point where I can do speaking engagements as an inspirational speaker?  I've even considered writing a book.  I have all of this going through my head and trying to decipher what is My plan and what is God's plan is so hard.  Then I started to pray about it tonight.  Then I decided to write in my journal about it.  As I wrote, I prayed.  As I questioned, answers started coming.  Prayer is the answer.  When I was in a crisis with my health, with the big scary C word, I prayed.  I had no qualms about praying about it, giving it to God and trusting Him to fix it!  Why wouldn't He do the same with this new crisis?  After praying, journaling, praying some more, I began to read His word.  Here's what I read in Isaiah 12, "In that day you will sing:  I will praise you, O Lord!  You were angry with me, but not any more.  Now you comfort me.  See, God has come to save me.  I will trust in him and not be afraid.  The Lord God is my strength and my song; he has given me victory."    Trust in God with everything.  Go to Him in prayer.  Seek His face, His ways, His answers.